tiny dancer is moving - Abigail (2024)
Plié, jeté, massacrer
Spoilers for the plot of this movie and also trigger warning not just for this review but for the actual movie because JESUS FUCK THERE IS SO MUCH GROSS STUFF IT’S AMAZING.
Abigail (2024)
Directed by: Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett (AKA Radio Silence)
Starring: Melissa Barrera, Dan Stevens, Kathryn Newton, Will Catlett, Kevin Durand, Angus Cloud, Alisha Weir, Giancarlo Esposito
Running time: 109 minutes
Out now
the plot, in brief
On the surface, it seems like a straightforward job: kidnap the 12-year-old ballerina daughter of an unknown, very rich man, keep her at a secondary location for 24 hours, get the man to pay the ransom. Tasked with the job: a group of six criminals who are strangers to each other. Crucial rule (as laid out by their informant)? No disclosing of personal information to the kid.
Seems simple enough… until two of their number turn up dead in quick succession and the gang is confronted by the realization that the kid they’ve kidnapped may not be quite as innocent as she seems, and that what they thought to be a straightforward evening’s work may come back to bite them… literally.
live footage of me leaving the cinema after watching Abigail (2024)
“we kidnapped a vampire” “a ballerina vampire”
On the one hand, I do see why people are a bit annoyed that what is ostensibly the film’s biggest twist is handed to them on a platter in the trailer (and how) - we as an audience go into the film with full knowledge that Abigail is a child vampire who also does a mean Rond de Jambe à Terre and it could mean that the first act of the movie can just feel like buildup until we get to the gore.
But consider the following:
At no point during that first act does it actually feel like “just buildup”; instead, after they successfully stage Abigail’s kidnapping (a thrilling scene itself) and get her to the secondary location - a fancy secluded mansion upstate- we get to spend time with the six strangers, who are told to refer to each other by aliases derived from the names of the Rat Pack, and just hang out as group dynamics establish themselves. And quickly begin to fester.
At no point during that first act does the film make it incredibly obvious that Angelina Ballerina (dixit Dan Stevens’s character, “Frank”) up there in the bedroom of the quite frankly stunning house is a vampire - even when that moment from the trailer where Abigail (Alisha Weir, we will get to her, trust me) ominously tells “Joey” (Melissa Barrera) that she’s sorry for what’s about to happen can be explained away by the fact that her dad is discovered to be a powerful crime boss.
When bodies do eventually start piling up and the remaining characters discover Abigail is a vampire, it is still a shock to the audience because from the second the first head rolls (literally) it quickly becomes very clear that Abigail is also fucking terrifyingly good at killing people.
It’s not even the biggest twist in the movie!
“what can I say? I like playing with my food”
In a scene which should by all right firmly establish her as a fearless young star in the making, Alisha Weir (who made her film debut in the adaptation of Matilda the Musical) as Abigail (with just the tiniest change in expression) changes from scared kidnappee to feral vampire beast.
In a year of extraordinary physical performances, this one stands out - the answer to “what if Claudia from Interview with a Vampire had a Wario”, Abigail is a snarling, growling, beastly (as in, there are noises coming out of her that are usually only made by rabid wolves) creation, made all the more terrifying by the fact that she utilizes those ballet moves in her killing, twirling and twisting as she’s biting and ripping chunks out of people.
Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett make every single one of those chunks feel visceral - this movie is delightfully Gross with a capital G. If you saw the ending to Ready or Not and thought “more movies need people just fucking exploding” there is brilliant news for you because guess what, there’s that!
One scene sees “Sammy” (the team’s hacker, played by THTH favourite and horror comedy queen Kathryn Newton) fall into a pool of bodies and it is as squelchy and disgusting as that sounds. Another, without giving too much away (seriously, this is the problem with reviewing current releases, I just want to tell you *EVERYTHING*) references a specific sequence in Luca Guadagnino’s Suspiria (2018) and I don’t actually care whether it’s by accident or design, it was DONE SPECIFICALLY FOR ME.
There is so, so much blood and guts and it’s to Alisha Weir’s credit that she takes this role and devours it whole (…. intended), what a find, what a star.
rat pack
On the other end of the equation are the six criminals. There’s the already mentioned “Joey”, a former Army medic and recovering addict (Barrera, reuniting with her Scream 5/6 directors and very good ) who is enlisted to be the person who looks after Abigail (Barrera and Weir have a weirdly wholesome chemistry). “Frank”, a former NYPD detective, is generally just an asshole with a sinister streak (Dan Stevens, and what a treat it is to have him in horror movies again, he is apparently super into vampire movies along the lines of A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night which, GIVE HIM THE INDIE ARTHOUSE VAMPIRE MOVIE HE DESERVES, COWARDS).
There’s also “Sammy” (Newton), a wealthy and capable hacker, who has one of the film’s most heartbreaking scenes. Marine sniper “Rickles” (Will Catlett), who does not trust anyone. “Dean” (Angus Cloud), the team’s driver, is clearly skilled at what he does but also tries to flirt with “Sammy” at the worst possible time (giving it a bit of “how you doin’” when you’re in the middle of kidnapping someone probs not the best idea babes). And then my absolute favourite, “Peter”, a mob enforcer with a thick Québécois accent played by Kevin Durand, who manages to give his character a touch of softness even when he’s running away screaming “VAMPIRE ON MY ASS!!!” in a fit of Canadian panic.
While you could argue that there’s not much room in the way of character development for this ragtag team in the story, I would say that it’s kind of besides the point: these characters are strangers to each other and we don’t actually find out their real names until much later in the film. There is no standard hero arc with this set of characters; the closest you come to that is with “Joey” but she comes into this plot already with a strong moral backbone and a reason to keep going. There is no arc needed for her - the arc of this story is “find out how the fuck to survive this night”.
If anything, it’s Abigail herself who goes through the most character development once you find out more about her and what she’s actually doing. And that in itself is quite cool because, as I said, Alisha Weir is spectacular to watch.
Plus, this movie is FUN. It takes a while to get there but once it does, it is a bloody good time (with extra blood) and I hope it’s not too long before we get the next Radio Silence horror purely because I’d love to see how they can work people exploding into more stories. I am but a simple creature of simple wishes after all, dear reader.
a note to end on
The film ends with a touching little tribute to Angus Cloud, who died shortly after completing his scenes as production was put on hiatus due to last summer’s SAG-AFTRA strikes. I don’t watch Euphoria so this is the first time I’ve seen him acting and I feel bereft at the loss. Cloud has a natural, easy screen presence in this film and it stands as a testament to his talent; Dan Stevens did an interview with Radio Times in which he spoke very highly of him and I can think of no better way to bring this issue to a close than to include his words:
"It was a real treat to get to work with Angus Cloud," he says of the former Euphoria star, who tragically died from an accidental drug overdose last summer.
"He was a very, very sweet, lovely boy. And I've never met anyone like him. He really was like all of our little brother on set, and we were all completely heartbroken when we lost him, in the middle of production, essentially, in the middle of the strike.
"So, you know, that also kind of brings people very, very close together, when something like that happens."
The film is dedicated to Cloud's memory, something Stevens says is "only right".
"He's terrific in it," he adds. "And it's very... it's an oddly special film for that reason."
i want to read this so bad but i have to see the movie first!